No. 04 · Class of 2026
KeyBench
The CornFor services to keyboards: has found more stuck keys than any vegetable in history.
Sorry, that was corny
The plaque
- Stage name
- The Corn
- Instrument
- A keyboard on a cob, space bar at the bottom.
- Day job
- Tests keyboards, mice and gamepads: dead and stuck keys, double-clicks, polling rate and stick drift.
- Signature move
- Turning a key press into popcorn, its way of saying the press was counted.
- Plays with
- SpeedBench (delivers its links), a very slow installer (no relation).
- Debut
- September 28, 2026, the first day of fof.lol
- Inducted
- October 10, 2026
The original
The logo you see on the site, in colour.
- The kernels are keys in staggered rows, like on a keyboard, with a space bar at the bottom.
- One key is pressed: the dark hole. It popped and flew up as popcorn.
- The husk wraps it like a palm rest.
On paper
The black-and-white version from the blog comics. Model sheet:
- calm
- delighted
- shy
- sly
Biography
Corn has rows of kernels; keyboards have rows of keys. Either nobody had noticed this before, or everybody had and was too polite to say. KeyBench’s cob is laid out like a keyboard, staggered rows and a space bar at the bottom, and the key you have just pressed pops out as popcorn.
It finds dead and stuck keys, catches mice that double-click on their own, measures the polling rate and shows how far a gamepad stick drifts when nobody is touching it. No drivers and no installer: it is a web page.
In the comics it is the bench’s introvert: it blushes, waits patiently for an installer stuck at 3% and falls asleep at 4%. For its induction the kernels around its face were cleared away, because a face made of keys is hard to read, even for a keyboard tester.
Greatest hits
Where to catch it in the blog comics:
- Our principles: waits for an installer at 3%, falls asleep at 4%, then gets a link and cheers.
- How to install the tools as apps: shows the three-dot menu and the Install item on Android.